Did You Ever Get a Blow Job in High School?

Don’t worry.

You’re not expected to answer that question.

But, what if you were?

Can you imagine sitting across the desk from a prospective employer and being required to talk about that time you had sex with your high school girlfriend after prom?

Or, having to explain your first blow job in a desperate attempt to persuade a landlord to rent to you?

That’s the reality that adults required to register as sex offenders as a result of consensual teenage relationships face every day.

Consensual Sex Among Teenagers

According to data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), more than 41% of high school students (grades 9-12) report having engaged in sexual intercourse. That may or may not have been true in “your day.” You may or may not find those numbers acceptable. But, that doesn’t change the facts. With more than 15.1 million high school students in U.S. public schools alone, 41% means more than 6,000,000 U.S. teens are having or have had sex.

Of course, that number doesn’t take into account private school students, homeschooled teens, those who are under 18 but no longer in high school, or those engaged in some level of consensual sexual contact other than intercourse. Thus, the actual number of teens engaging in consensual sexual relationships is even higher.

The teens who don’t get caught, who have parents who don’t report their partners to law enforcement, who live in states with Romeo and Juliet exceptions, or who live in communities where prosecutors decline to file charges in consensual teen sex cases go on with their lives. The smaller–but not small enough–percentage who are prosecuted end up on sex offender registries for 10, 20, or 25 years–or even for life.

At 30, or 40, or for the rest of their lives, they find themselves forced to describe their youthful sexual encounters to strangers, in hopes that they will be believed so that they can land jobs, get apartments, or just let their kids have friends over for a birthday party…because they did the same thing 41% of their peers did. Maybe, the same thing you did.

 

Michigan Law Change Comes too Late for Teen “Sex Offender”

Justin Fawcett was 20 years old when he died of a drug overdose in his bedroom–just a month after learning that he would be required to register as  a sex offender for the next 25 years.

The crime that landed Justin on the Michigan sex offender registry was a consensual sexual relationship with a 14-year-old high school classmate when he was 17.

Justin’s parents, who say their son was despondent after learning that he would be placed on the registry and hopeless about the future, became advocates for more sensible registry laws in Michigan. Ultimately, Michigan did implement some changes to protect underage “sex offenders,”–seven years after Justin’s death.

Did the Punishment Fit the Crime?

Texas Father Required to Register as a Sex Offender for Life

When you look up Frank Rodriguez on the Texas sex offender registry, you’ll find that he was convicted of Sexual Assault of a Child. That sounds like something a potential neighbor might want to know about, but in truth it’s what the state of Texas called it when Frank, then a senior in high school, had consensual sex with his 15-year-old girlfriend.

That was more than 20 years ago.  Today, Frank and his “victim,” Nikki, are married and have four daughters…and they and their children are still paying the price for their high school relationship.

Frank’s job prospects are limited. He can’t coach his children’s sports teams, He can’t leave the state without registering with local law enforcement. And, any neighbor who opts to check the area for sex offenders will be greeted with the news that he sexually assaulted a child.

The Accidental Sex Offender

Suburban Teen Commits Suicide after Being Threatened with Sex Offender Registration

In January of 2017, 16-year-old Corey Walgren jumped from the roof of a parking garage near his Naperville, Illinois high school and died.

Just hours before his death, the honor student and athlete had been eating lunch with friends in the high school cafeteria when he was summoned to the Dean’s office. There, a Naperville police officer confronted him about recording a consensual sexual encounter with another 16-year-old.

The officer and the high school dean told the boy that he was under investigation for child pornography and might have to register as a sex offender. In the brief window between this conversation and Walgren’s mother’s arrival at the high school to pick him up, the teen slipped away and committed suicide.

A Teen Took His Life; Now His Family is Suing His School and the Police